6th Grade Rebellion

So, this morning, at 7:16 a.m. as I was getting ready for work, my phone beeped with an incoming text message. It was from a local number but one that I didn't recognize. This is what it said:

Msg:FWD: send this to every middle schooler at CPA: where [sic] comfy day stuff friday and no one will get in trouble if every1 does it. :)

CPA is Christ Presbyterian Academy - it's a private school located on my route to work.

Vellly Intellesting...

It would seem as though I am in possession of highly sensitive information. Information of a revolutionary nature...or at least a coup. Right? School uniforms be damned, the middle schoolers are plotting their "comfy day stuff" rebellion. They have used the modern medium of text message to convey and spread their mutinous cause.

I guess this would imply that most middle schoolers have their own cell phones? Hunh.

In the spirit of solidarity, I will not turn them into the authorities. And hopefully, none of the CPA authorities are aware of the existence of this blog and thus the subversive efforts of the CPA middle schoolers.

Viva la Revolucion!

Toilet Texting

Picture, if you will, a public restroom with four stalls (this is a women's restroom so don't picture any urinals). It's mid-morning. It's time for a potty break. You enter the restroom just as someone else is closing the door to one of the stalls. You, being the obsessive toilet room etiquette freak that you are, choose the stall farthest away from the one that was recently occupied. Suddenly, you hear the unmistakable punching of cell phone keys. Trust me, I know this sound.

I'll admit I am somewhat of a text messaging guru. Okay, well maybe not so much "guru" as "enthusiast". Yes…a text messaging enthusiast. Text messaging may be the most perfect communication method since smoke signals. It's less invasive than a phone call but more immediate than an email. It's personal but not intrusive. And it does not disturb those around you…EXCEPT when you are in a toilet stall trying to relieve yourself. And here we are.

First, there are the logistics of peeing while texting. Even the most dexterous amongst us surely would have difficulty composing a text message while going potty. Yes? Or am I off-base here? Maybe it's just me, but when I am in the bathroom (especially when it's not my own personal bathroom), my mission is to get in and get out in the shortest amount of time. I'm not going in there to hang out and chat with a friend via text. Knowing my luck (er…clumsiness), I would be texting…and…well…going to the bathroom; I would reach for the toilet paper; my fingers would become confused (um, excuse me - are we texting here or going potty!?) and my phone would end up IN the toilet.

Second, I know there are those (BETH-A-NEE) who will talk on the phone while on the pot (I hate that by the way) but at least in that case there are no innocent bystanders affected by the toilet talk. Don't even get me started on those inconsiderate cretins who engage in a phone conversation while in a public restroom. Unless you're calling 911, can't it wait until AFTER you're done using the toilet facilities?! Hearing someone furiously punching phone keys two stalls down from you is an inhibitor. An inhibitor! You heard me - and you know what I mean.

Bottom line: texting is a privilege, people! Do not abuse it by taking it to the toilet.